Looking back, is there a moment when you wish you'd been kinder to someone?

B Natural answer

Yes. In college, I had a friend who was going through a hard breakup, and at the time I thought I was being practical by keeping things light. In reality, I was probably too distant. I told myself I was trying not to pry, but I think I was just uncomfortable and caught up in my own head. If I'd been more mature, I would have asked a simpler question and stayed with the silence instead of changing the subject. What I regret most is that I didn't really give people the benefit of the doubt when they were acting strangely. I took her mood personally, when really she was struggling. It would have taken a bit of patience to listen properly. I think that kind of kindness matters because people remember whether you made space for them. I didn't do anything cruel, but I was less generous than I could have been, and that sticks with me.

Key phrases in this answer

• caught up in my own head — too focused on your own thoughts and worries“I was caught up in my own head and missed what she needed.”
• give people the benefit of the doubt — assume someone means well before judging them“I should have given people the benefit of the doubt.”
• a bit of patience — some calm tolerance while waiting or listening“It would have taken a bit of patience to listen properly.”
• spoken up sooner — said something earlier instead of staying quiet“I wish I'd spoken up sooner and helped him.”
• cut him some slack — be less strict or more forgiving“He was new, so I should have cut him some slack.”
• carry that guilt around — feel guilty about something for a long time“I still carry that guilt around years later.”