Looking back, how has the way you handle small talk changed as you've got older?

A natural way to answer

It's softened a lot. I used to treat it as a performance and judge myself harshly afterwards. These days I see it as low-stakes and genuinely enjoy it, which paradoxically makes me far better at it. Letting go of the pressure to impress changed everything.

Key phrases to use

• clam up — suddenly become silent, often from shyness or nerves“I clam up the moment I'm put on the spot.”
• take the edge off — reduce the intensity of something unpleasant, like nerves“A deep breath takes the edge off my nerves.”
• pressure to impress — the felt need to make a good impression on others“Once I dropped the pressure to impress, I relaxed.”
• cringe into oblivion — feel overwhelmingly embarrassed about something“I still cringe into oblivion over that speech.”